Things that make me want to hurl…

I’m just gonna say it…seeing the American flag in places it really shouldn’t be makes me cringe.
Seeing the word “patriot”, or hearing someone blather on about being a “patriot” and being challenged to PROVE that I’m a “patriot” straight up makes me want to fucking hurl.
Lynn Cheney wrote a kid’s book about Washington crossing the Delaware.
It’s billed as a “Wintertime story for young patriots”…
Guess whose kids won’t be reading THAT book anytime soon.
Or the dumbfucks who have to fly the BIGGEST fucking American flag they can find from the back of their faded red pickup truck (like the numbnuts behind me today) with a “don’t tread on me” sticker.
I’m betting he thinks he’s a patriot too.
Let’s be real, and get down to brass tax…none of these idiots would be doing those things if the President was a white Republican.
“Patriot” wouldn’t be as nauseatingly overused as it’s become, and people could sit quietly in their homes praying to Jesus to make them rich so they can go on a cruise…because don’t you know?
Jesus WANTS you to be rich.
Jesus WANTS you to have stuff, and MORE stuff.
And while you’re buying stuff, don’t forget to buy GOLD and GUNS…(because once you have STUFF the government is going to try and take YOUR STUFF through taxes and give it to those lazy no account poor people.)
But that’s okay, because God made sure that you were born in the GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD!
And don’t you dare believe that Thomas Jefferson was an atheist, or that the Founders believed in religious tolerance.
Don’t trouble your head with all that sciency stuff.
Jesus rode a DINOSAUR into Jerusalem.
He was killed because he had the audacity-just like you to believe that a man should keep the money he earns through hard work
The poor aren’t poor because there’s no jobs, they’re poor because their lazy!
And Jesus says you are ENTITLED too keep your gold and guns and Bibles because damnit YOU ARE AN AMERICAN.
You’re better than the rest of the world!
And America is a Christian Country!
And don’t you be ashamed to call yourself a Christian, because even though those liberals, and homosexuals, and atheists persecute you…hell, even if they KILL you, go right ahead and rebuke them in Jesus’ name because you’re going to live in a mansion made of pearls and walk down streets paved with gold when you die.
…Right?
…Right…
What better way to get the masses to willingly suffer…while assholes like Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh and every single televangelist becomes a millionaire several times over…
They’ll live in a mansion for all eternity, what’s 70 years of poverty and struggle to make ends meet between friends?
Give ’em a flag, tell them the Black Man who may or may not be from this country (you’re really not sure after all) is coming for their guns.
It’s really that easy.
And it all started the first time the first state government started digging into public education.

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