Catching up

Part of the piss about living in the boondocks is that we have an air card for internet. When our 5 gigs is up each month, that’s it.
So let’s see…both Keylime and Boo were sick last week with gnarly colds. Boo lost his voice and Keylime had to go on an inhaler…and they were both with me 24/7. Fun times.
I did take Keylime out trick or treating, we hit about 15-20 houses. It’s a “nice” neighborhood, so the candy’s usually  good.
He knows he doesn’t need a lot, so to carry his candy he took a little plastic lunchbox.
Anyway, before he walked up to each house I reminded him to make sure to say “thank you”, and then after he got his candy I double checked “did you say thank you?”
At first he forgot a couple times and went back to say it. At one house another mother whose kids had gone up to the house with him, looked at me and in superior tones said “If my kids don’t say thank you they get their candy taken away.”
(sorry, but that just seems cruel to me)
Before our diagnosis I would’ve probably smiled nervously and hunched my shoulders like the parental failure I thought I was…
But I gotta say, knowing that he has Asperger’s has helped me immensely too.
I know I’m not a failure, I know that just because something worked with Boo doesn’t guarantee it will work with Keylime.
I looked back at that woman, smiled and said “Well, we have Asperger’s, we’re doing our best.”
And like magic, she looked properly embarrassed and shut the fuck up.
By the end of the night, not only was Keylime remembering to say thank you (with only the beforehand reminder), but at the last two houses, he was actually looking at the candy-giver, not the candy, when he said it.
To me that screams success, and I told him how proud I was of him.
Did I mention Boo broke up with his girlfriend or just his intention to?
Well, when he saw her in art class on Thursday he was going to do it after class…but her dad was standing right there.
I took pity on him and let him text her.
The gist being that he did like her, but with school, his DeMolay responsibilities, and everything else he really didn’t have time for a girlfriend and that it wasn’t very fair to her that he wasn’t able to spend time with her. He hoped she understood.
She texted back “Of course I understand. Thank you for being honest.”
I could tell he was relieved, and that there’s a burden off his back.
I was very happy with the way he handled it, and I’m very proud of him…
One day I hope he figures out that if he quits instigating shit with Keylime that his life will go even smoother.
But such is the role of the older sibling, no?


2 thoughts on “Catching up

  1. Love it! I have to say my 15yo daughter learned really quick what buttons to push with my 7yo (with aspergers) to get him to have a meltdown. No amount of talking to her about it has worked 😦

    • I googled and printed out a bunch of information regarding what it’s like to be a sibling to an aspy. It worked-for about a week.
      When it got particularly bad I had Boo start work on a research paper regarding Aspergers. The man, the condition, symptoms, treatments, etc. It’s ongoing, and whenever it gets really bad I send him to do more research.


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